“did the patient respond to some of your terror-pictures of the future? Did you work in some good self-pitiying glances at the happy past?- some fine thrills in the pit of his stomach were there?”
so, let me be a bit vulnerable here- these 3 questions asked by screwtape struck a chord with me because I am often guilty of wishing I didn’t know the truth. The desire to feel the thrill without the knowledge that the thrill robs me. The desire to forget (though i am known to rejoice in knowing). A desire to feel sorry for my loss as a christian rather than to be joyful with the insurmountable gain.
that you too?
i suspect that it is not that uncommon. like that guy in ‘the matrix’ who chose illusion over reality simply because the taste of steak was good enough. and yet, as common as it is, it is a highly dangerous thought because if we take the thought to it’s logical end, we arrive at the horrible conclusion that God has robbed us. He has robbed us of our illusion and this is disappointing. Of course, the perfect thing to think would be: He has gracefully exposed our minds to the brilliance of truth. But of course, being human, we tend to see it mostly from the other side.
the next time the “semi-innocent” thought: ‘i wish i didn’t know better, but unfortunately i do’ comes knocking on my brain, I will be more weary of it. I will choose to see that the real enjoyment of truth is in the absolute absence of illusion.
so, let me be a bit vulnerable here- these 3 questions asked by screwtape struck a chord with me because I am often guilty of wishing I didn’t know the truth. The desire to feel the thrill without the knowledge that the thrill robs me. The desire to forget (though i am known to rejoice in knowing). A desire to feel sorry for my loss as a christian rather than to be joyful with the insurmountable gain.
that you too?
i suspect that it is not that uncommon. like that guy in ‘the matrix’ who chose illusion over reality simply because the taste of steak was good enough. and yet, as common as it is, it is a highly dangerous thought because if we take the thought to it’s logical end, we arrive at the horrible conclusion that God has robbed us. He has robbed us of our illusion and this is disappointing. Of course, the perfect thing to think would be: He has gracefully exposed our minds to the brilliance of truth. But of course, being human, we tend to see it mostly from the other side.
the next time the “semi-innocent” thought: ‘i wish i didn’t know better, but unfortunately i do’ comes knocking on my brain, I will be more weary of it. I will choose to see that the real enjoyment of truth is in the absolute absence of illusion.
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